How I fell in love with horror after becoming a mother
How I fell in love with horror after becoming a mother
Plus: Bathroom reno big reveal, the truth about veneers, and the perfect autumn coat
After dinner last Friday night, my husband and I sat on our sofa with a bottle of wine and watched the 1979 haunted house classic The Amityville Horror. I hadn’t seen it since some school friends and I convinced an older sister to rent it for us from Blockbuster when we were about 14; none of us could sleep for a fortnight afterwards. When the movie came to a sticky end on Friday, I went to bed and slept like a baby.
I have been terrified of scary movies my whole life. Or I was until quite recently. The films would lurk in my psyche for days afterwards and, even though I found them enjoyable to watch, the price paid - days of looking under beds and in closets, haunted dreams - just wasn’t worth it. I’d more or less given up watching them until I met my husband, who lured me back in with his love of classics such as Don’t Look Now and Rosemary’s Baby. I found these movies completely thrilling but, even though my husband was living with me at this point, they still left me terrified. After watching The Exorcist together, I made him sit in the bathroom and talk to me while I took a shower. I couldn’t be alone, even for ten minutes.
But then something happened. I had a baby and all of a sudden I could watch anything, no matter how scary it was. I discovered it when I agreed to watch Saint Maud with my husband when our son was about six months old and I uncharacteristically shrugged it off. No nightmares, no insisting on company for bathroom visits. Then we watched The Evil Dead, Midsommar, Get Out, Paranormal Activity, The Babadook… I couldn’t get enough. None of them fed my overactive imagination after the credits rolled like they used to. I could simply turn off the TV and move on.
We know women’s brains change when they go through pregnancy but here’s my theory: after becoming a mother the scariest thing that I can imagine is something happening to my child. And now these tales of ghosts and killers and bogeymen just don’t wield the power they once had over me. Of course, this could all be a coincidence and I just aged out of being a big, fat scaredy-cat. But I’m not so sure it is. When we see very real danger for our children at every turn, suddenly the Babadook just doesn’t seem that scary.
There’s no shortage of terrifying films that have motherhood themes - Psycho, Hereditary, The Omen are just a few - but I wonder if I am alone in motherhood bringing this new immunity to fictional horror? Either way, I have loved working my way through the canon - and sleeping soundly after.
And for some Halloween fun, my top 5 favourite scary films:
5. The Others (2001)
4. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
3. Rosemary’s Baby (1968)
2. Ringu (Ring) (1998)
1. The Shining (1980)
I’d love to know your favourite horror film. And have you become a mother and found you can watch just about anything or are you more scared than ever? Let me know in the comments…
Right, the bathroom renovations are finally complete and having banged on about it enough, I simply must share the results. I’m putting this behind the paywall because who needs their pre-renovated bathroom on the internet forever? However, I’m also sharing the results on my Instagram Stories, which will be live for the next 24 hours. Enjoy!