5 Things I’m Doing In August
Everything I've been reading, going to, watching, buying and listening to this month
Hi friends. I apologise that I’ve missed the last couple of months of doing this round-up but life happened. Anyway, we’re back now! Here’s everything I’ve been up to in August.
READING
Eve Babitz - I Used To Be Charming
I want to talk less about I Used To Be Charming, which is a magnificently gossipy and no holds barred collection of essays from 1975 to 1997 by the writer who died in 2021, which I’m hugely enjoying. I would like to use this entry instead to share how I came to be reading the book.
A couple of weeks after my dad died a book arrived for me from my local bookstore. Having not ordered one myself, my first thought was “Oh someone’s sent me a bereavement book”. I slightly winced*. Then on opening the package, I discovered the Babitz book, one I had not read. I looked at the back; it wasn’t about death or grief, it was about The Godfather, and yoga, and Fiorucci. There was, however, no note. Had I slept-shopped? I asked my husband if he knew anything about it to which he confirmed he did not. He suggested a friend of ours who might be the mystery gifter, as he was a keen Babitz fan, so I approached him. His response blew me away. “It was me!” he texted. “I’m fortunate enough to not have lost a parent yet so have no great insight to offer. But I wanted to mark it in some way… I read this book during lockdown and remember finding it a nice tonic”. He even had the receipt included so I could change it if I wanted (from the bookshop around the corner from me - easy!) Sending a fun, escapist book to someone going through something bleak is just such a fantastic idea. I know people can struggle with how to deal with recently bereaved friends (I’ve definitely been there) and I thought this was the perfect gesture.
*It should go without saying that I’ve sent an unsolicited copy of The Year Of Magical Thinking to my mother.
GOING
Abba Voyage
I finally made it to Abba Voyage, the “virtual concert” in Stratford, east London, which has been going since May 2022 and I LOVED IT. I grew up in an Abba household; “Fernando” is one of the best songs ever written - no further questions - so I took my mum on a Friday night and we had a hoot. What they’ve achieved is extraordinary, you instantly forget that you’re watching digital avatars of the band (they’re not holograms) and quickly settle into a setlist of back to back bangers. The whole crowd was on their feet dancing (apparently Julia Roberts was there having the time of her life the night before us). My mum saw the band in Perth in 1977 and she reckoned this was just as brilliant an experience. At the moment it’s set to run until November (they might extend their contract but it hasn’t been confirmed yet) so if you’re an Abba fan (don’t be shy they’re cool) then get yourself to Stratford before it’s too late.
WATCHING
Slip (streaming on ITVX)
I should point out that Slip was released on Roku in the US last year but it only just came out in the UK this month. I have no idea how it ended up on ITVX, home of I’m A Celebrity and Love Island, when surely it makes more sense to be on Channel 4 or something but I don’t really know how these things work. Just don’t be put off that it’s on ITVX because Slip is excellent.
It has an incredible elevator pitch: a bored, married, childfree woman approaching 40 has an affair and discovers that every time she orgasms she jumps into a parallel life - and parallel relationship - she could have had. Think Quantum Leap meets Netflix’s Easy meets the diner scene in When Harry Met Sally.
I’ve been an admirer of Zoe Lister-Jones, Slip’s star, writer and director, for a while now. I liked her memorable cameo in New Girl and have enjoyed some of the films she’s made such as Band Aid. She specialises in small, real and humorous films about indie girls in crisis, which is my favourite genre after romcoms for pensioners (truly I’ve seen every romance starring Diane Keaton and Blythe Danner, ask me anything).
Lister-Jones plays Mae Cannon, a 39-year-old art curator living in Brooklyn who complains that her life is a “super-banal dream”. Of her relationship with her husband, she says, “After a certain amount of time, you’re just single together”. And so she has an affair with a musician and, after climaxing, wakes up to find herself married to that musician. Another time she gets down with the owner of a lesbian bar and wakes to find herself in a gay marriage with a daughter. There are prick finance guys along the way as well as a Lynchian sequence after she masturbates in order to escape one of the worlds she finds herself in. It’s really funny, wildly inventive and will make you look hard at your own life choices.
BUYING
This September we’re starting potty training! Why do I feel weirdly emotional about this milestone? On the one hand, I can’t wait to be rid of nappies for good - they’re expensive, terrible for the environment and a nuisance. And what a joy it will be to get rid of the stinky nappy bin finally. But, on the other hand, my baby won’t be in nappies anymore! I’m also slightly dreading the inevitable mishaps that are coming our way. I listened to an interesting segment on Radio 2 this week about how one in four British children are starting school without being toilet trained and it’s causing havoc in the classroom as teachers are forced to change pupils’ nappies resulting in a huge impact on learning. My son now has the language skills needed to toilet train (literally every time I leave a room he asks “Mummy wee-wee?” Thanks for that) so we’re going for it. We’re armed with Dr Becky’s Potty Program (I love Dr Becky’s Instagram, it’s the only parenting account I follow, and this program is free). Wish us luck.
LISTENING
Nick Cave - Wild God
I first got into Nick Cave when I bought A Boatman’s Call on a whim when I was about 23, I think it was one of those 3 for £20 CD deals they used to have in Fopp. I’ve been listening to the first songs released from his upcoming album Wild God, which is out on August 30th. His career trajectory from self-confessed “nasty little guy” into a sort of elder sage of rock via his albums on grief and his generous - and often moving - newsletter The Red Hand Files is staggering. But really here I wanted to share his appearance on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert last week.
Nick Cave is not the sort of person you associate with late night chat shows and indeed he seems rather taken aback at the incessant crowd whooping early on; “This is going to be easy!” he quips. The audience soon realises they are in the presence of someone who might just have something interesting to say and shuts the fuck up to listen intently as Cave talks about everything from the power of music to singing with Johnny Cash to the death of his sons. It’s an astonishing 20 minute conversation and a rare gleam of humanity and weight in the otherwise gimmicky late night scene. “It’s the terrible truth about grief that ultimately you can feel joy in a way you never thought you could”, he says towards the end. I loved it.
I hope you all have a brilliant weekend. Gillian x
Having lurked around your free posts for a while every single thing in this newsletter made me want to subscribe - super irritating you can’t do it in the app (and clearly not your fault!) but I genuinely really enjoyed this - thanks